Now that Stranger Things 4 is out, Caleb McLaughlin is just glad he doesn’t have to lie anymore. In a new interview, the actor talked about one of the most heartbreaking moments from season 4.

In the final episode, the Hawkins group is reunited to end Vecna but not before he nearly kills Max, breaking her bones and blinding her which leaves a pretty helpless Lucas to pick up the pieces. In an emotional scene, Lucas is holding Max in his arms and trying to bring her back to life. Both actors gave terrific acting performances and it became a standout moment in volume two.

It turns out that Caleb had no idea when he was going to shoot that pivotal moment. “I got on set that day not knowing I was doing that scene,” he says. “I was like, ‘Oh, we’re doing that scene today?’ They [the Duffers] were like, ‘Yeah, so you better be ready.’”

“It actually worked out better that way, because if [it was] next week or tomorrow, I’m going to overthink it,” McLaughlin says. “If you tell me we’re about to do it, I’m like, Okay, cool. Just give me 30 [minutes] to an hour to mentally prepare, and I’m good.”

The actor talked with Sadie about the physicality of the scene, with McLaughlin making sure she was comfortable when he cradled her, gripped her arm, or sobbed in her face. “I’m crying and there are snot and tears falling into her eyes and her mouth, and I’m like, ‘Sorry for that!’” he recalls. “She’s like, ‘No, you’re fine. You’re acting’…. Sadie did a great job of helping me get there.”

Once the scene was finally wrapped, McLaughlin was wiped out. “I had to lay down on the floor for like, 20 to 30 seconds to just get my energy back, because all I was doing was crying,” he says. “I lost my voice that week. It definitely took a lot out of me.”